A grin on my face
The dark turned to fright
I realize the case  
Of what just happened last night

I had a beautiful nightmare
About my friends and the past
These memories from somewhere
Just nothing but a flash

I heard them calling
All my tears fell and shown
I kept on going
They're so much less than I've ever known

I didn't see the sin
And the pain of this dive
To believe what can't be seen
Like their lies in my life

And so I ended my flight
I woke up..... and I said to myself
What a wonderful night

Music of the day :
Hungry Ghost - I Don't Think About You Anymore, But I don't Think About You Anyless

My love,
I'm crying over you
My heart, eyes, mind,
all for the love of you

My love,
please answer me
I love you so much,
I'm going crazy

My love,
why did you leave me
We were so wonderful,
both of us... you and me

My love,
I still won't admit
You're floating away,
and I'm at my limit

My love,
was our world a reality
Your sunlight in my universe,
was it all a silly fantasy

My love,
I keep on wonderin
My tears just won't stop,
do you see this moon that I'm seein

My love,
time falls away
But my love for you,
will always stay

Music of the day :
Kings of Convenience - The Weights Of My Words

Today I see a rainbow
Tomorrow I touch the air flow

Then I reach the star which I thought was a guitar
Well who cares who knows, I still have that cute car

I walk,
I dance,
I sing,
And my mind keeps on humming

Song from song, I draw a long
Notes to notes, you draw in dots

I'm calling for the monster under your bed
Cause I want to kill those zits colored red

We are a leaf, so fragile and deaf
Like me in my house, cooking like a master chef

I turn left then I turn right
Seeing your clothes gave me a fright

We keep talking till we both start laughing
We keep sleeping till we both start flying

I hate you and you hate me
Though both of us like a doll named Kimi

Well,
But,
In the end,
I'm still with you

Music of the day : 
Kimya Dawson - Tire Swing

My life grows sevenfold and eightfold
But the truth is kept,
For not a single love does it bear

Even if I can make smiles bloom brilliantly
To bear so much hate,
Is beyond my ability

Music of the day :
Taku Iwasaki - One to One

Sound of the crow coming down
I feel myself being a clown
Entertaining people with my fake
Without any effort in the make

And so everyone begin to fly
Soaring to the deep, vast sky
Only one remains the same
Sitting there enjoying the game
Of my life, boring and lame

Words by words going through my line
Song by song filling up my mind
Moving to the emptiness of my soul
Smiling and crying for me
Me and only me

I saw someone with no face nor name
Looking at me in my cold freezing rain
Saying something I can't understand
The wounds are healing and I can go to the end

Will you save me from this place
Showing me the light of my maze
Rushing with the speed of none
Being there for me in my comfort zone

You're somehow different in my life like lake
I hope you can see through my fake
Giving me hope to start a new

I will believe in you
Forever and ever
Leaving my reflections behind


Music of the day :
Module - Twilight Stolen

I am a question to the world
Not an answer to be heard
Or a moment..
To be held in your arms

And what do you think you'd ever say?
I won't listen anyway
You don't know me
And I can't be what you want me to be

And what do you think you'd understand?
I'm a boy, no, I'm a man
You can befriend me
You can also throw me away

And how can I learn what's never shown?
Yeah, I stand here on my own
 I don't know myself
Cause I'm not here

And I want a moment to be real
Wanna touch things I don't feel
Wanna hold on and feel I belong
And how can the world want me to change?
They're the ones that stay the same

And you see the things I never see
All you wanted you could be
This feeling, this hurt, this life isn't neat
Though you can't imagine one bit

Still I want you to tell me who I am
Can you help me be human?
They can't break me
As long as I know who I am

They can't tell me who to be
Cause I'm not what they see
Yeah, the world is still sleeping while I keep on dreaming for me
And their words are just whispers and lies that I'll never believe

I hope I can meet you someday
Be beside you everyday
Through the hardship and the pain
While you color my life with your paint



In this post, I took a LOT of words from the lyric of this soundtrack music : Goo Goo Dolls - I'm still here. Their lyrics are quite different from what I wrote of course, I changed a few and added some too. If you want to listen to it, feel free. Great movie from Disney by the way.

Guilt flows beneath all lies
Gathering and packing everything in every size

The dark color resembles actions of the past
While the white for the present
 
Those guilt we all have within ourselves
Corrupting our bones and flesh

As we all think of something in this life
Those thoughts become actions
Actions which we all can predict by directions
Knowing anything can be done in just one step
Then another..another and finally over the gap
And reach that light we all hope for

But I guess I'm not one of them
I can't predict my steps like them
Ever since that day begun
My hopes are all gone to the run 
Leaving me cold and dead
Never comes back and never will

It became my nightmare
And eventually became me

I am not human
Cause human can gain people trust, can enjoy living, can live with other people
I hurt people
I hated them for doing wrong and ignoring other pains
I betrayed them for something stupid

I don't know why I'm like this
Maybe this is all just my fate
Or only my own delusional?
Either way, this life will end and things won't ever change
For who I am, and what I do

Music of the day :
Taku Iwasaki - Hate and Regret

I look at the sky and it's still the same .
As always...forever...
That grey blue charted color which never changes.
It's looking back at me, the same look. The same expression.

I keep on thinking to myself,
what am I doing here.
I don't belong here,
I don't belong anywhere...

My existence is just a mere reflection of what people think,
what people want to see,
imagination of a perfect someone who always be kind and generous at first.
But.. in the end, whom everyone hates..

My personality rotten while time passes by,
and so does my relations with people.

My past is a living fantasy.
Nothing seems like what it supposed to be.
I feel like I'm going crazy..
Everything.. just so blurry.
 
My present is an empty glass.
Just waiting to be filled, again and again.
While all the guilt and stupidity keep on wasting it.
Consuming every last bit left inside.

Sometimes,
I pour tea into my glass,
It become sweet for a while, then it vanishes.
I add some coffee, I feel the bitterness taking over.
It also vanishes, gone forever.

No, I believe I can get it again.
I can get more.
And so,
I mix those two color of taste..
Mix them again and again,
with all my heart, tears, blood, and sweat.

Hoping it will be something different.
Something new, awesome, and unpredictable..
A wonderful thing,
that would change my life for the better.

Ah.. what a foolish thought,
the thought that kept me struggling for this 19 years of my life..

When I look at it, the glass,
It was cracked all along.
A huge crack,
hidden and secured.

Ah yes, that crack. The flaw in every effort I've done.
Why didn't I notice it before? ..Why?
What made this crack? ..What?
...I don't know myself.

Or maybe.... I'm just pretending that there's nothing all along.
I gave up.
I couldn't fix that crack..
It will only get bigger, and bigger.

And in the end,
there will be no more glass.
No more me.
I will be lost...forever.

Dark...dark....so dark.

Cold...cold..ever so cold.

Lonely...lonely..oh so lonely.

Hate.

Somehow,
I always feel like I'm in this space.
Far far away from everyone, everything.
The stars and planets around me rotate through the same circulation.
Round..round...and round they go.

And so,
I'm floating freely.
Moving so fast.....going nowhere.
Smiles and laughs, words and rhythms,
joy and sorrow, curiosity and determination.
Opening and closing, coming out of every black hole in my universe like life..

My life,
is always in pieces..
Making it in one piece,
was never my specialty.
Faking is, and always will be..

Music of the day :
Crashing - Gersey